{"id":4289,"date":"2014-03-26T12:09:24","date_gmt":"2014-03-26T17:09:24","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/customwordpresssites.com\/mjb\/?p=4289"},"modified":"2026-02-26T13:51:06","modified_gmt":"2026-02-26T19:51:06","slug":"the-conundrum-of-kids-at-church","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/customwordpresssites.com\/mjb\/2014\/03\/26\/the-conundrum-of-kids-at-church\/","title":{"rendered":"The conundrum of kids at church"},"content":{"rendered":"

One of my Facebook friends recently posted a rant about mothers who show up late to and leave early from Mass.\u00a0 He stated that he has more respect for people who don\u2019t bother coming at all: \u201cEither be all in or all out.\u201d\u00a0 Others chimed in with \u201cAmens\u201d and further complaints about the entertainment and food that parents bring to church for their children nowadays.\u00a0 Having arrived 10 minutes late to Mass that morning, library tote full of Dora books slung over one shoulder and a diaper bag with emergency snacks hanging on the other, I felt at once embarrassed and defensive.<\/p>\n

\"13064_6765\"<\/a>
http:\/\/www.sxc.hu\/photo\/13064<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

Part of me wanted to dismiss his vent outright: clearly, this was the na\u00efve and uncompassionate perspective of someone who\u2019s not yet a parent. He just doesn\u2019t understand the monolithic venture that is Getting Out the Door with Little Ones,<\/em> I thought to myself. After all, I had spent my entire morning trying to get to Mass on time\u2026 but two blowout diapers and a child who is absolutely determined to put her shoes on all by herself<\/strong> had conspired to neutralize my good intentions. Let\u2019s see him do it any better,<\/em> was my rather un-Christian reaction.<\/p>\n

Still, his words gnawed at me, probably because I have wrestled with the conundrum of kids at church since my daughter was born two and a half years ago.<\/p>\n

The fact is, children at Mass are<\/em> distracting – to those around them and, most especially, to their parents.\u00a0 Prayerful reverence is not easily practiced with a fussy baby in your lap and a squirmy preschooler at your side.\u00a0 There have been multiple occasions in which, nerves frayed and feeling far less<\/em> peaceful than I did before the start of Mass, I wonder if it was even worth it to attend.<\/p>\n

Yet something inside me always answers \u201cYes!\u201d\u00a0 I believe there is value in attending Mass with kids\u2026 Even when it means enduring the walk of shame up to the only open pew (at the very front of the church, naturally) during the Gospel Alleluia, or spending the entire hour shushing and chasing my two-year-old, or willing myself not to engage in a glaring war with a man who disapproves of nursing in church.<\/p>\n

We as a family are rarely (if ever) \u201call in\u201d when it comes to Mass: we are late or agitated or exhausted or impatient or poopy or hungry or a catastrophic mix of all these – but I have to believe that God appreciates our presence there despite -indeed because of\u00a0<\/em>– our very conspicuous deficiencies in piety.\u00a0 We are the Body of Christ: messy, flawed, unfocused\u2026 and beloved.<\/p>\n

My daughters may not be able to understand or participate fully in the Eucharistic celebration, and their lack of volume\/impulse control may detract from others\u2019 ability to pray as they would prefer.\u00a0 Still, they are vessels of a special kind of grace, and I believe that the Mass as a whole is better, not worse, because my girls are present.\u00a0 Their faith cannot be anything but childlike, and so it ministers in a way no polished homily can.\u00a0 Once, as we shuffled in line to receive Eucharist, my daughter proclaimed loudly \u201cMama, there\u2019s Jesus on the cross, and Jesus in Comoonin [Communion], and Jesus in my heart!\u201d\u00a0 I know I\u2019m not the only adult whose mind, in that moment, was called away from wandering thoughts and into reflection upon the sacred Mystery of Christ.<\/p>\n

Jesus said, \u201cLet the little children come to me.\u201d\u00a0 I\u2019m pretty sure He knew exactly what that implied for parents, and so on Sundays like this last one, I presume an addendum to Christ\u2019s directive: \u00a0\u201c. . .even if they are ten minutes late and their shoes don\u2019t match.\u201d<\/p>\n

Nicole Steele Wooldridge attends Mass with her daughters in the Seattle, Wash. area; she apologizes if, while doing so, her baby has recently spit up on your rosary or her two-year-old has scribbled in your prayer book.\u00a0 If it makes you feel any better, she probably hasn\u2019t had a shower in a few days.<\/em><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"One of my Facebook friends recently posted a rant about mothers who show up late to and leave early from Mass.\u00a0 He stated that he has more respect for people who don\u2019t bother coming at all: \u201cEither be all in or all out.\u201d\u00a0 Others chimed in with \u201cAmens\u201d and further complaints about the entertainment and...","protected":false},"author":51099403,"featured_media":4291,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_kad_blocks_custom_css":"","_kad_blocks_head_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_body_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_footer_custom_js":"","episode_type":"","audio_file":"","podmotor_file_id":"","podmotor_episode_id":"","cover_image":"","cover_image_id":"","duration":"","filesize":"","filesize_raw":"","date_recorded":"","explicit":"","block":"","_kad_post_transparent":"","_kad_post_title":"","_kad_post_layout":"","_kad_post_sidebar_id":"","_kad_post_content_style":"","_kad_post_vertical_padding":"","_kad_post_feature":"","_kad_post_feature_position":"","_kad_post_header":false,"_kad_post_footer":false,"_kad_post_classname":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[698755598],"tags":[1343,214,2416,7140,43813,81819,401,406,7816,413129,185567,87848,5309,1053],"series":[698756626],"class_list":["post-4289","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-christian-family-life","tag-children","tag-christianity","tag-church","tag-devotion","tag-eucharist","tag-facebook","tag-faith","tag-family","tag-god","tag-going-to-church","tag-imperfections","tag-judgement","tag-parenting","tag-parents","series-messy-jesus-business"],"acf":[],"episode_featured_image":"https:\/\/customwordpresssites.com\/mjb\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/03\/13064_6765.jpg","episode_player_image":"https:\/\/customwordpresssites.com\/mjb\/wp-content\/plugins\/seriously-simple-podcasting\/assets\/images\/no-album-art.png","download_link":"","player_link":"","audio_player":false,"episode_data":{"playerMode":"dark","subscribeUrls":{"apple_podcasts":{"key":"apple_podcasts","url":"","label":"Apple Podcasts","class":"apple_podcasts","icon":"apple-podcasts.png"},"stitcher":{"key":"stitcher","url":"","label":"Stitcher","class":"stitcher","icon":"stitcher.png"},"google_podcasts":{"key":"google_podcasts","url":"","label":"Google Podcasts","class":"google_podcasts","icon":"google-podcasts.png"},"spotify":{"key":"spotify","url":"","label":"Spotify","class":"spotify","icon":"spotify.png"}},"rssFeedUrl":"https:\/\/customwordpresssites.com\/mjb\/feed\/podcast\/messy-jesus-business","embedCode":"

The conundrum of kids at church<\/a><\/blockquote>