{"id":25653,"date":"2026-03-26T08:00:00","date_gmt":"2026-03-26T13:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/messyjesusbusiness.com\/?p=25212"},"modified":"2026-05-05T09:23:35","modified_gmt":"2026-05-05T14:23:35","slug":"the-necessary-mess-of-community-building","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/customwordpresssites.com\/mjb\/2026\/03\/26\/the-necessary-mess-of-community-building\/","title":{"rendered":"The Necessary Mess of Community Building\u00a0"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

It was gorgeous, warm Spring weather here last Saturday and my restless body was ready to soak in the sun, to explore the woods and search for opening buds. Yet, I sat inside a stuffy dining room at a community meeting most of the day to prepare for our upcoming assembly (a significant meeting for us). And, I was in meetings with sisters the day before and the next day too. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

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Members of the FSPA<\/a> community. Photo by Sr. Julia Walsh.<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n\n\n\n

Before I entered the convent, I didn\u2019t imagine that approximately half of my life would be spent sitting at tables and hearing what others have to say. Before my Christian faith formed a conviction in me that community building is central to Gospel living, I figured that most of my adult Christian life would be a mix of service and prayer, that those activities would be good enough.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

It turns out that loving God and neighbor starts with loving those who are nearest, loving those we share life with. To build God\u2019s reign we must build loving communities. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

And building loving communities takes a lot of meetings: house meetings, committee meetings, one-on-one meetings, whole community meetings. We invest a lot of time and energy in meetings because the trials of listening, sharing, learning, and working together deepens our relationships, our bonds. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

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Members of the FSPA<\/a> community. Photo by Sr. Julia Walsh.<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n\n\n\n

As I said, it’s about loving our neighbors, and real love requires availability and generosity. To love is to know. Love is really key. Dietrich Bonhoeffer wrote, \u201cThe person who loves their dream of community will destroy community, but the person who loves those around them will create community.\u201d So I try to focus on love instead of what I envision when I am in all the meetings. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Yes, there\u2019s more than meetings: prayer, parties, games, outings, shared adventures. Sharing a meal with others is ordinary holiness, I figure, and I am glad it\u2019s part of my daily life in the cozy apartment with the two other Sisters I live with, and along with the more than sixty other sisters on the block. Plus, it\u2019s actually a relief that I don\u2019t have to do all the cooking and chores. It\u2019s a grace that we share the labor and the loads of daily living. We say yes to being together, to enjoying one another\u2019s company and laughing. Sometimes community building is fun, but most of the time it\u2019s all-consuming. Even so, community building is always worthwhile.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

We say yes because we know that Gospel living is rooted in community life: we are the Church when we\u2019re united together. Our faith tradition insists that we build community too. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

\n

We must consider how to rouse one another to love and good works. We should not stay away from our assembly, as is the custom of some, but encourage one another. -Hebrews 10:24-25<\/em><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n\n\n

\n
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Members of the FSPA<\/a> community. Photo courtesy of Sr. Julia Walsh (far right).<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<\/div>\n\n\n

I understand and value all this, but if I am honest, I can admit that as much as I love and believe in it, there are days when I would simply rather not. <\/em>There are days when I am lazy, when I\u2019d rather isolate myself. There are times when I am irritable and it\u2019s really challenging to be around people because I feel so on edge. It\u2019s messy to be part of a community, to help the community grow and develop in healthy ways, when we all seem to cycle through bad moods, exhaustion, and brokenness at different times. It\u2019s inevitable that we will each be misunderstood or rejected at some point. Without trying, we hurt one another. And even though we are all dedicated to the project of community building (yes, we agree that we need each other), the reality is that we don\u2019t actually like<\/em> each other. It would be easier if we all liked each other.\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Sure, it\u2019s messy. Conflict is normal, and we don\u2019t always deal with our differences well. Not everyone is skilled in communications or has a high emotional intelligence<\/a>. It\u2019s likely that we\u2019ll become disappointed. It\u2019s easy to become discouraged, disillusioned.\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n

It works better when we offer humility, vulnerability, and agape love. It\u2019s better when we stay open to conversion, growth. This means we have to accept that we can be wrong. Forgiveness can be heart-wrenching. None of this is easy. All of this is demanding, draining. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Yet, this mission to build community has great value.\u00a0 A quick social analysis and a read of \u201cthe signs of the times\u201d helps us know how the Gospel activity of community building promotes a culture of life and proclaims hope to a hurting humanity. The epidemic of loneliness<\/a> is serious and destructive. Studies reveal that loneliness is a major cause for extremism<\/a> and violence. People get caught up in the wrong stuff, simply because they are searching for belonging and meaning like everyone else, and get swayed by lies and fear. I want to help create healthy alternatives to this horror.\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Indeed, community building is a very necessary messy Gospel activity. Christians are called to love their neighbors, yes, and we are also called to be hospitable and joyful. As we help others to feel welcome and allow the groups we\u2019re part of to shift and grow, we\u2019re giving witness to the value of building healthy communities. As we do, we become like salt, light, and a city on the hill (this is the reign of God we\u2019re building you see) and we give the world hope. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"\"
Members of the FSPA<\/a> community. Photo courtesy of Sr. Julia Walsh (second from right).<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n\n\n\n

This means I\u2019ll accept meetings as part of the package. I\u2019ll say yes to the project of working together and sharing vulnerably. I must ask for help and work toward interdependent intentional shared life. Yes, I may be horribly flawed and weak, but that\u2019s why I need others, why I need you, why we need one another. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

\n

Above all, let your love for one another be intense, because love covers a multitude of sins. Be hospitable to one another without complaining. As each one has received a gift, use it to serve one another as good stewards of God\u2019s varied grace. -1 Peter 4:8-10<\/em><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n\n\n\n

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It was gorgeous, warm Spring weather here last Saturday and my restless body was ready to soak in the sun, to explore the woods and search for opening buds. 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